Saturday, June 25, 2011

I want to start a fresh...

It has been a while since I last blogged, never seem to have the energy to type the stuff that's happening in my head. So, finally, I dragged my sorry ass out of bed this freezing cold evening to share the things that have been going on the last couple weeks.

A month ago, almost, I became once again single. It seemed to be a mutual agreement, but to be completely honest, it was a sacrifice on my part. For certain reasons we couldn't be together and I knew that, I knew it from the beginning. Yet I still went through with the two-month relationship. And I knew in the beginning that those where the same reasons that would ultimately cause us not to be together. He was someone I had so much in common with, someone I will always want in my life.

The last couple of weeks a lot has been going through my very creative mind. It's creative in that it will always seem to think of an excuse or a way out of becoming focused. I recently realised in discussion with a friend ('bob'), that I am bored with life. It feels like I don't have a life actually. I realised I need to set goals for myself. I mean all the major goals that were set out before me are now complete. I finished school, University, government service. and now.

That said, what goals are there for a gay guy? I mean marriage is slightly far fetched (No offence to the married) and I don't see myself having kids (Even though I really do want), what else is there apart from work related 'achievements'. Professionally, I could be come the best at what I do. Work satisfaction is a big thing, I guess. Purpose is important to everyone, guess I feel I need a purpose.

Also. I realised that I haven't been able to hold a relationship with a guy for more than two months. When I dated my ex-girlfriend, we went out for two years.. Starting to think something is wrong.

I mentioned goals earlier.
This is a list of my goals (Or headings of goals that need to be refined):
1. Gym and Diet. Hard
2. Do a sports course in 2012
3. Focus on revising
4. Sell my car in the next 3 months.
5. Save. (Just Save)
6. Save to go overseas in July 2012
7. Pay off my study loan in the next 2 years.
8. Blog Weekly

Ok that's all I have for now, but I need to refine them as I said.

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